You Know You're A Dog Person If...

~ You have a kiddie wading pool in the yard but no small children

~ Lintwheels are on your shopping list every week.

~ Your freezer containes more dog bones than anything.* You hang around the dog section of your local bookstore way too often.

~ Your non-dog friends won't eat food prepared in your kitchen.

~ Your parents refer to your pet as their "grand-dog."

~ You have baby gates permanently installed at strategic places around the house but no babies.

~ You open your purse and that big bunch of baggies you use for pick-up pops out .

~ You skip breakfast so you can walk your dog in the morning before work.

~ The trash basket is more or less permanently installed in the kitchen sink, to keep the dog out of it while you're at work.

~ You can't see out the passenger side of the windshield because there are dog nose prints all over the inside.

~ You don't go to happy hours with co-workers anymore because you need to go home and walk your dog.

~ You don't think it's the least bit strange to stand in the back yard chirping "Molly, Pee!" over and over at your dog who tends to play and forget what she's our there for.

~ You go to the pet supply store every Saturday because it's one of the very few places that lets you bring your dog inside, and the dog loves to go with you.

~ You get an extra long hose on your shower massage just so you can use it to wash the dog in the tub, without making the dog sit hip deep in water.

~ You and the dog come down with something flu like on the same day. The dog sees the vet while you settle for an over the counter remedy from the drug store.

~ You not only have dog toys strewn about, but your guests also have to be careful not to trip on the dog jumps. (well we gotta exercise them in the winter somehow)

~ Your weekend activities are planned around taking your dog for a hike.

~ You refer to yourself as "mommy" and "daddy".

~ Your dog sleeps with you.

~ You'd rather stay home on Saturday night and cuddle your doggies than go to the movies with your sweetie.

~ You keep an extra water dish in your second-floor bedroom, in case your dog gets thirsty at night.

~ You avoid vacuuming the house as long as possible because the dogs are afraid of the brain-sucker.

~ When your dog is getting old and arthritic, and you go buy lumber and build it a small staircase so it can climb onto the bed by itself.

~ You shovel a zig-zag path in the back yard snow so your dog can reach all of his favorite places.

~ Your have 32 different names for your dogs. Most make no sense but they understand.

~ Your dog eats cat poop but you still let him/her kiss you (but not immediately after, of course)

~ You never completely finish a piece of steak or chicken so the dog gets some too.

~ Poop has become a source of conversation for you and your significant other.

~ You are the only idiot walking in the pouring rain because your dog needs his walk.

~ You send birthday, anniversary and Christmas cards from your dog.

~ You like people who like your dogs. You despise people who don't.

~ You lecture people on responsible dog ownership every chance you get.

~ You keep eating even though you find a dog hair in your pasta.

~ You carry dog biscuits in your pockets all the time.

~ You make popcorn just so you can play catch with your dog.

~ You talk about your dogs like other people talk about their kids.

~ You have your dog pictures on your office desk. (but no one else's).

~ Your license plate or license plate frame mentions your dogs.

~ You match your furniture, carpet and clothes to your dog.

The American Bloodhound Club Bulletin Spring 1996

New Puppy

Don't smell crotches, don't eat plants.
Don't steal food or underpants.
Don't eat my socks, don't grab my hair . . .
DON'T RIP THE STUFFING FROM THAT CHAIR!
Don't eat those peas! Don't touch that bush!
Don't chew my shoes ... What IS that mush?
Eat your cookie, drink your drink.
Outta the toilet! Outta the sink!!
AWAY FROM THE CAT BOX, IT'S FOR THE CAT!!
(And MUST you kiss me? After that???)
Yes, raising a puppy is not for the lazy!
Though puppies are funny, they're also quite crazy.
But don't despair, though its toil and strife.
After 3 years, you'll get back your life!
So, let's go for "walkies", you can "do your thing".
(And perhaps I'll get back my GOOD DIAMOND RING!)

Author Unknown

(*laugh*)

My Dogs Live Here

My dogs live here, they're here to stay.
you don't like pets, be on your way.
they share my home, my food, my space
this is their home, this is their place.

You will find dog hair on the floor,
they will alert you're at the door.
they may request a little pat,
a simple "no" will settle that.

It gripes me when I hear you say
"just how is it you live this way?
they smell, they shed, they're in the way.."
WHO ASKED YOU? is all I can say..

They love me more than anyone,
my voice is like the rising sun,
they merely have to hear me say
"C'mon girls, time to go and play"

then tails wag and faces grin,
they bounce and hop and make a din.
They never say "no time for you",
they're always there, to GO and DO.

and if I'm sad? They're by my side
and if I'm mad? they circle wide
and if I laugh, they laugh with me
they understand, they always see.

so once again, I say to you
come visit me, but know this too..
My dogs live here, they're here to stay.
you don't like pets, be on your way.
they share my home, my food, my space
this is their home, this is their place..

-anonymous

Member of the Family

What would I do without you
My precious, furry friend?...
Part mischief, but all blessing,
And faithful to the end!

You look at me with eyes of love:
You never hold a grudge...
You think I'm far too wonderful
To criticize or judge.

It seems your greatest joy in life
Is being close to me...
I think God knew how comforting
Your warm, soft fur would be.

I know you think your human,
But I'm glad it isn't true...
The world would be a nicer place
If folks we're more like you!

A few short years is all we have:
One day we'll have to part...
But you my pet, will always have
A place within my heart.

- Hope Marrington Molb